Good Bye Cortland

I awoke this morning to windows wide open, a crisp breeze flowing in my bedroom, and an apartment which has a temperature below 85 degrees for the first time in months. This brought to me a renewed sense of excitement- Fall is on the way! Along with Fall comes a new chapter in my life- graduate school at Boston College.

A few weeks ago, on Friday August 20, I worked my final shift as a residential case manager at Cortland Group Home. Immediately following my departure, I travelled to Maine for a wedding and spent the next week in Maine with time split between my family's camp in Lake View and my hometown in South Portland. During this time I was able to process my feelings of leaving the group home. What did I learn? What could I have done better? How will I take my experiences and use them to become a better clinician in the future? While working at the group home I witnessed truly horrific events in the lives of people who are affected by severe mental illness. Along with this, I was able to witness small gains in these same people's lives as they learned to advocate for themselves and develop empowerment. Learning to wash their dishes, operate the laundry machine, and complete their personal hygiene were all major achievements.

As a newly graduated twentysomething with a degree in psychology and no experience, I was excited to change people's lives and get them back on their own two feet. I was ready to rid their lives of severe mental illness forever. Sadly, it did not take long for me to realize just how naive I was. Instead, I focused on the small advancements in these people's lives, such as doing their own laundry and completing their personal hygiene, and realized they were small miracles.

As I begin a new chapter at Boston College this week, I continue to think about my clients at the group home and wonder how they are doing. It did not take long for me to realize after leaving the group home that to some extent, I needed my clients much more then they needed me. I think this level of dependency between humans is a beautiful concept that promotes peace and unity among all people.